(Swear) Word On The Streets

I am back from some more letterbox stuffing. The best house sign I read this evening was:

“The velociraptors housed behind this door have only been trained to disembowel callers wearing blue rosettes

Despite this kind of heartening sight, the activists here are nervy. Doing my rounds, I bumped into two—both County Council candidates—and I spoke to one of the most dedicated local Labour Party members on the phone earlier today. The candidates both thought it would be close, but that Anne Campbell, Cambridge’s Labour MP these past thirteen years, would hang on to just enough of her majority of 8 000 to win—I think it will be cut to three figures. My friend on the phone was more pessimistic, but he has been talking to a lot of middle-class, Iraq-obsessed soon-to-be-LibDem voters lately, as he has trudged around the ward in which we both live. The real workers around here couldn’t care less.

It’s fair to say I don’t see eye-to-eye with Anne Campbell about many things: Iraq, tuition fees, Israel; but I do respect and admire her hugely. She is an outstandingly good MP. This, I hope, will be her salvation from Cambridge’s latest wave of drabby, gentrifying, wholemeal-trousered, pureed organic mung bean-eating Bens and Hannahs—with their recycling boxes and their baby tandems and their handwoven Nepalese “Not In Our Name” welcome mats. While they practise Pontius Pilates (a system of handwashing exercises imported from Hollywood) it’s the duty of the rest of us to elect the good guys. To paraphrase Bob Geldof: “Don’t go down the pub. Go to your polling station first and give us your fucking votes!”

13 Comments

  1. Andy C
    Posted 05May05 at 07:39 | Permalink

    Is there something wrong with recycling boxes that eludes me?

  2. Posted 05May05 at 08:49 | Permalink

    Nothing at all. I have one myself, but mine isn’t full of old copies of The Independent.

  3. Will H
    Posted 05May05 at 13:08 | Permalink

    What is it full of? The Sun? That’s better isn’t it: so much more real.

  4. Posted 05May05 at 13:14 | Permalink

    “What is it full of?”

    The Economist. It’s important for me to stay abreast of Jordan’s growth rate.

    “The Sun? That’s better isn’t it: so much more real.”

    No. The Sun‘s crap as well, but it’s crap without pretensions.

  5. Will H
    Posted 05May05 at 14:04 | Permalink

    Pretensions of what? ‘Pretensions’ on its own is meaningless; personally, I’ll take a few pretensions if it means I don’t have to wade through page after page of xenophobic, harmful nonsense and that Blair interview.

  6. Posted 05May05 at 14:13 | Permalink

    Dear Pootergeek,

    We would be extremely grateful if you could have a look at our blog and, if you thought it appropriate, stick a link to it on your site.

    We are at http://spinoff.blogspirit.com.

    Yours etc,

    Spinoff.

  7. Soverytired
    Posted 05May05 at 16:40 | Permalink

    That’s right. Insult the people who, thanks to Blair, are the closest thing Labour now has to a base. Hope that the working class, which didn’t vote Labour last time, will decide that Thatcherism ain’t so bad after all and turn out for Blair. And if they don’t, you can blame Iraq and just keep on “modernising”.

  8. Posted 05May05 at 17:09 | Permalink

    Pootergeek: It’s important for me to stay abreast of Jordan’s growth rate.

    Why, is she having another breast job done? And wouldn’t The Sun be the best place to read up on that sort of thing?

  9. Posted 05May05 at 17:28 | Permalink

    I’ll take a few pretensions if it means I don’t have to wade through page after page of xenophobic, harmful nonsense….

    I’d avoid the Independent then. By the time you’ve waded through page after page of anti-American and anti-Israeli nonsense, you’ll be be crying out for a page or two of pretensions.

  10. Lex
    Posted 05May05 at 17:35 | Permalink

    “The candidates both thought it would be close, but that Anne Campbell, Cambridge’s Labour MP these past thirteen years, would hang on to just enough of her majority of 8 000 to win—I think it will be cut to three figures.”

    Hmmm. I’m not so confident. I have hardly talked to anyone who is thinking of voting Labour – well, students. I’m increasingly inclined to the view that Cambridge may be one of those Labour-held constituencies with sufficient radical bougie and student votes to favour the Lib Dems’ anti- war and top-up fees stance.

  11. Timbeaux
    Posted 05May05 at 18:55 | Permalink

    Hmmm….rumor over here is that the Tories are doing oustanding, relative to expectations anyway. Could be Tony’s downfall no matter what the majority is. I don’t have a whole lot of love for Tony (other than Iraq, of course), but I get the uncanny feeling that a lot of people will be “fleeing” Labour for all the wrong reasons, and that’s made worse since there are so many good ones out there. Not that there’s a great alternative, of course, but that’s politics everywhere.

    Anyway, I’m just a clueless American observing from 4650 miles away, but it’s mighty interesting to watch.

  12. Will H
    Posted 06May05 at 14:27 | Permalink

    ‘I’d avoid the Independent then. By the time you’ve waded through page after page of anti-American and anti-Israeli nonsense, you’ll be be crying out for a page or two of pretensions.’

    Rubbish. There’s a difference between criticism/scrutiny and xenophobia, albeit there are those who like to pretend anything not rabidly pro-US/Israel is anti-American/anti-Semitic. But that’s clearly nonsense.

  13. Posted 18Mar06 at 05:07 | Permalink

    What do you do when your chair breaks?
    Call a chairman.

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