“Meysterr McClaren, you hyev harrdly touched your sushi.”
And this one’s for my dad, because I never thought I’d hear an American sports commentator on US TV say the words “probably all the way back to Preston North End”:
[SVEN-GÖRAN ERIKSSON’s BEDROOM. The former England coach lies cradled in one arm of NANCY DELL’OLIO. As she bends her face over his shiny pate, he adds another tick to his “To Do” list next to the words “have sex” and below the phrases “polish glasses” and “Portuguese lesson”.] SVEN: Nancy, my love-bagel, it iss now time […]
I caught up with wongaBlog this morning. I enjoyed this post about Jonathan Edwards’ reflections on his conversion from Christianity to atheism. It’s all downhill from here, Jonathan. Believers might be wrong, but believing often makes for happier and more successful people; and I enjoyed this marvellous rant about anti speed camera campaigners. My apologies […]
While his master leads the England bowling attack, Steve Harmison’s dog, Magoo, participates in the British Dog Agility Championships.
Honky takes revenge for Tiger Woods.
Jogging from the bank yesterday evening to catch Richard Brincklow’s in-store performance at Passenger’s launch of their new single [buy it now!*], I stopped to photograph this: Regulars will know that I am not an admirer of Banksy’s work, but circumstances and the shrewd planning of the staff at artrepublic temporarily turned the 2006 effort of […]
I’ve been staying at my parents’ this weekend—thanks, folks—while I’ve been attending the National Wedding Show [of which more soon at the Wedding Photography Blog]. The show was on at the National Exhibition Centre, round the corner from their place. As a boy I never imagined that I’d grow up to spend working Saturdays, for […]
Remember this place? Yesterday I’m in there and a middle-aged white bloke in a cravat is sounding off at the (Gujarati) proprietor as the nearest consultable expert on the question of contemporary Indian pulchritude. “Everybody says that one on Big Brother is beautiful, but I’ve seen better. She’s very pale skinned. I wonder if she […]
I’m busy so, instead of writing my own stuff, I’ll just point at the efforts of some other bloggers. This at Fisking Central is a point worth making over and over again: Utopia doesn’t refer to a better world; it’s used to describe a perfect world. Belief in human perfectability—and its accompanying rejection of all that is imperfect—is […]
…what about the shocking behaviour of Australian cricket fans?
Yesterday, over the phone, my dad and I held our own Ashes inquest. It was brief.
Someone at Harry’s Place comments that Until now, I thought Gwyneth Paltrow was Welsh.” which reminds me of being in a video rental store in NYC in the late 90s with a local. An old Tom Jones song starts playing. “Well, I never,” says I to my native companion in my conspicuously British way, “This is […]
For regulars here not also regulars at Norm’s place: the Prof is currently in Upsidedownland watching the cricket between Australia and England. Yesterday he linked to an article from The Australian about England bowler Monty Panesar. Reading it, this passage, er, struck me: [T]he safest way to dive into the water is to keep your […]
Thanks to my dad for telling me about this article in yesterday’s Observer sports section about mixed race sportsmen. There’s lots of pointless hand-wringing about the phrase “half-caste”, but it’s interesting otherwise. During the rise of Tiger Woods and around the time this hit the headlines I used to joke with a colleague who was a […]
Norm writes: Defoe appears to bite Mascherano, and Martin Jol says it’s only a nibble. And that’s a defence? Surely a man of Prof Geras’s erudition has heard of “the Chew-backer defense”?
…who is usually as reliable as that bloke in the green polo shirt down your local in providing some lazy assessment of the day’s most widely discussed sporting matter. Today he manages to cram ten clichés (two, possibly three, of them misapplied) and three uses of the phrase “in terms of” into a half-page article […]
It would be so much easier to dismiss The Guardian if it didn’t employ some excellent writers. Its television critics, for example, are usually more entertaining than the programmes they review. The reason I still buy the paper on Fridays is because the “music” part of the film and music supplement actually covers popular music […]
“The result is not fair.” —Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho on scraping a one-all draw at home to Villa today “Blobby stick!” —PooterGeek on the same final score
Daddy-long-legs invasion now threatens Europe.
From The Daily Telegraph: A solicitor who enjoyed a flamboyant lifestyle by living off the earnings of prostitution has been jailed for 12 months. Davy Tang, 42, a father of two, was able to buy a large country house, a Porsche, a Mercedes and a BMW, as well as jewellery worth £9,000 with his cut from […]
I enjoyed typing that. Martin’s magic makes Thierry look ordin-erry.
It has long been a given in my life that Aston Villa, the football team I “support”, is mediocre—not completely rubbish, not great, just financially secure and chronically underachieving. The man widely believed to be responsible for this long-running dullness, the club’s chairman “Deadly” Doug Ellis, has now agreed he will “step down” and allow […]
I know more about science than either football or cricket. For my dad it’s the other way round. This means that our conversations about sport often lapse into arguments in which he’ll say something like, “Tom Finney would be a class above if he were playing today.” And I’ll say something like, “Do you know […]
Following Blognor Regis’s coverage of the Hollywood-style comeback of Floyd Landis in the Tour, I did a Google News search for the latest and I found this real story from the online version of The Gainsville Sun: LACK OF LANCE HURTS AREA INTEREST By Elizabeth Hillaker Special to the Sun July 21. 2006 6:01AM As the Tour de France nears what is […]
Isolated a talented striker up front. Lost possession cheaply. Couldn’t score from open play. Vulnerable defending set-pieces. Star player sent off for violent conduct. Beaten on penalties. Who says England weren’t in the World Cup final?
Via the Rubbish Man I came upon this. Despite the inherent wrongness of psychoanalysis, it’s rather a good read: “England’s repeated failure in penalty shoot-outs is not down to bad fortune, as the English media, with its empiricist presuppositions, insists. To lose once might be an accident, but to lose five times demands a psychoanalytic explanation. […]
Following Britain’s torrid summer of sporting failure, the organising committee has radically revised the programme for the 2012 Olympics. Here, in alphabetical order, are the new events you’ll be able to enjoy: Binge Drinking Camp Cat Blogging Connery Imperschonating Crazy Golf Croquet Doggy Paddle Druidism English Rules Schadenfreude Extreme Ironing Extreme Irony Fencing (And Decking) Freestyle Queuing 10K Funny Walk Gentle Comedy Getting A Mardy On Happy Slapping Hating The English […]
On average, over the rest of their lives, each of these children will have to endure the spectacle of England crashing out of international football championships on penalties a further twenty-nine times. Look at those fresh, hopeful faces and imagine a football boot stamping on each one—forever. Surely there is no God.