I received a 352kb email message last week from a hotel confirming my two-night booking. I hope they have a gym where their staff can burn off that kind of excess.
Read MoreMarch 2006
A Nobel Peace Prizewinner Writes
The Guardian today prints Jimmy Carter’s peace plan for the Middle East: Israel should withdraw from the occupied territories, and its right to exist must be recognised by all Arabs. Thanks, Jimmy.
Read MoreMy Mother The Racist
The Ablutionist published an excellent post yesterday describing exactly the sort of casual wanging around of the word “racist” that I referred to on Friday. I wonder what advocate-but-not-adopter of the Stone Age lifestyle Fiona Watson would have thought if she had overheard my mother on a bus telling me as a child whenever my […]
Read MoreNorm Referencing
Someone tried to post a spam link here to the home of a new philosophy called “Normism”. I’m going to do better than that: this post quotes and links directly to the Normism site. I’m sure the spammer chose me as victim because of the many references here to normblog. The marvellous thing is, Normism […]
Read MoreParanoia By Proxy?
This evening I’d like to talk shit with you all. It’s interesting that many of the people most eager to brand those they disapprove of as “racist” have never been victims of real racism in their lives. I am wary of using the word. Since I left the town I grew up in (and escaped […]
Read MoreWave Bye-Bye To An Hour Of Your Life
This is one of those wonderful resources that make the Web so addictive: an almost-scholarly collection of pop songs influenced by classical pieces, written by a musicologist going by the pseudonym of “Ostin Allegro”, and complete with MP3 snippets. (For younger/non-UK readers this is an Austin Allegro, a not-inherently-terrible small car let down by shockingly […]
Read MoreA Top Post By A Top Bloke
For a while I wondered if she was a parody, so broken and infantile and hackneyed were her arguments. Now I only ever read her when someone writes about her. Madeleine Bunting‘s intellectual and moral development has been so corrupted by the ideological diseases of our time that she is hardly qualified to read out […]
Read MoreChef Can’t Stand Heat
Scientology is evil rubbish. South Park is gloriously disrespectful of every kind of religious and ideological fairy tale. So this story LOS ANGELES (Reuters) – Soul singer Isaac Hayes said on Monday he was quitting his job as the voice of the lusty character “Chef” on the satiric cable TV cartoon “South Park,” citing the […]
Read MoreConversation With My Father
PG: Did you see that cricket match?! PG Snr: No, but I’m going to watch the highlights tonight. It’s the looks on the Aussies’ faces I want to see.
Read MoreDon’t Knock It Till You’ve Tried It
Thanks to PooterGeek’s hosts upgrading their servers, I’ve been getting a lot of spam lately, but guess what: some of the stuff they try to sell you in those emails really works. Women were powerless to resist Damian’s bubbly new look. I also need to buy some looser trousers.
Read More“Dr” Death Begins His New Career
If you search the medical literature for “D Counsell”—type “Counsell-D [AU]” into the search box here—half the papers returned have my name on them; the other half carry the name of an anaesthesiologist who didn’t drop out of medical school. Today someone emailed the wrong D J Counsell to offer him a temporary consultant anaesthetics post. […]
Read MoreKink Of The Month
I can only imagine that a sexually frustrated militant Deaf separatist would go searching the Web for pictures of “naked deaf girls”, but you lot might know better. UPDATE: For anyone brought here by such a search in the future, Deafs.com might get you closer to your goal.
Read MoreDeath, Taxes, And Shark Week On The Discovery Channel
Oh, the inevitability! Five hours ago they released a security upgrade for WordPress 2.01, taking it to version 2.02. Hang on to your mouses. Here I go again.
Read MoreMusical Differences
There’s an overlap between my CD collection and Richard‘s, but we do come at music from slightly different angles. He subscribes to The Wire; I subscribe to Sound On Sound. In the most recent edition of The Wire all three of their interviewees had beards—two of them goatees. In the most recent Sound On Sound the main interviewee was 80s pop […]
Read MoreSpring Cleaning
After a lot of boring tweaking PooterGeek should now be looking a little more like it used to, though there’s still a lot of tweaking left to be done. It’s also running on WordPress 2.01. I only changed version because I had to. When I saw Jo Salmon take the plunge I thought wryly, “Ah, […]
Read MoreIn My Day We Made Our Own Entertainment
Brighton and Hove’s local newspaper is called The Argus. Its staff don’t have much to write about: the football team and its struggle for a stadium, resident micro-celebrity Zoe Ball and her slightly more famous husband Fat Boy Slim. I think I’ve only bought a copy twice. Yesterday was the second time. Why? Because of […]
Read More…And A Glasgow Kiss From Shuggy
Continuing the follow-ups to this, thanks to siaw in the comments for drawing our attention to this fine attack.
Read MoreInternet Bloody Explorer: Software Written By Bum-heads
UPDATE 2: Would you believe I’m trying to fix all this while builders are fixing a broken pipe that’s flooded my flat? UPDATE: PooterGeek now looks strange to all of you. I hope normal service will be resumed soon. It has come to my attention that PooterGeek suddenly looks strange to those of you reading […]
Read MoreBuy A Blind Person A Labrador!
My friends Auriol and Peter Auriol and Peter are the over-dressed ones in the middle. [click image to enlarge] are running the London Marathon in aid of Guide Dogs For The Blind. Give ’em some money and a big, daft, blond dog some useful work to do.
Read MorePooterGeek’s In-Depth Oscar Night Analysis
On the one hand, thousands of religious loons want you dead; on the other hand is Padma Lakshmi: Salman “you’d look smug too” Rushdie and Padma Lakshmi Meanwhile, WTF?: Helena “I am hoping the giant spider on my head will distract you from my dress” Bonham Carter [stolen from MSN]
Read MoreAnd Another One Bites
Ooh, it‘s turning grievous for Younge as Kammo gets in there too.
Read MoreCountrified
For girls (or boys) reading this who used to have a crush on John Corbett, the actor who played DJ Chris Stevens in the TV series Northern Exposure, an uncharacteristically frivolous Gloria Salt has some bad news. For the (other) boys, all I can say is that there’s a special kind of schadenfreude that comes […]
Read MoreButcher-Bloggers Update
First blood to Tim.
Read MoreShelf-Reflection
Two of the many dangers waiting for me on the road to the local supermarket are second-hand shops with tables full of old books outside them. I know that, if I am not strong, I will not only forget what I set out to buy, but will wind up wasting time, space, and money. There […]
Read MoreSlice’n’Dice
Flicking through the opinion pages of the Guardian this morning I can see there are going to be some busy bloggers today. I predict that, by lunchtime, David “we pick on Israel because it’s a democracy” Clark will be lying slumped over his PowerBook, killed in the Drawing Room with the Knife, by the Professor. […]
Read MoreEbonexia
I’m glad I don’t have TV and have to witness the emergence of a strange new media species: the unhealthily thin black woman who isn’t the victim of a poor harvest. Beyoncé watches in horror as Cece Sammy and Thandie Newton walk past her on their way to their tantric nutritionist [via Hak]
Read MoreSky-Fairies Continue To Advise Leaders Of Free World
When I was about nine years old I told a bunch of advancing micro-racists that I wasn’t scared of them because “Jesus was on my side”. That the Son of God was shamefully absent throughout my subsequent twatting should have been a lesson to me then, but it was a few more years before I […]
Read MoreSerious Breakfast Mistake
Above the usual manufactured outrage headline on the front page of the Daily Mail this morning I read the following smaller banner: He’s quizzed over £350 000 “bribe”. Their home is remortgaged three times in four years. Yet not once, says Tessa Jowell, did she ask her husband: “What the hell is going on, darling?” Crikey. […]
Read MoreFatuous Bint
Regular readers here know that I had little time for the argument that “we” had to invade Iraq because Saddam Hussein had a strategic arsenal trained on Hoxton hidden under his various country homes. It’s been said that I’ve been quite rude about people who signed up too confidently for certain types of WMD-related bollocks, […]
Read MoreI Haven’t Got A Girlfriend Either
Bernd Schneider reviews Star Trek model kits: The Enterprise-C is one of the very few starship model kits that can be recommended to beginners. It is also one of the best researched kits by AMT/Ertl. Provided the model is carefully painted, it may look very close to the actual studio model. The most annoying flaw, […]
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